rediscovering eden
Who am I, that the Lord of all the earth
Would care to know my name
Would care to feel my hurt
Who am I, that the bright and morning Star
Would choose to light the way
For my ever wandering heart
Not because of who I am
But because of what You've done
Not because of what I've done
But because of who You are
I am a flower quickly fading
Here today and gone tomorrow
A wave tossed in the ocean
A vapor in the wind
Still You hear me when I'm calling
Lord, You catch me when I'm falling
And You've told me who I am
I am Yours, I am Yours
Who Am I, that the eyes that see my sin
Would look on me with love
and watch me rise again
Who Am I, that the voice that calmed the sea
Would call out through the rain
And calm the storm in me
whom shall i fear
whom shall i fear
i am yours
dailies
Wednesday, April 30, 2008
-3:49 PM
well...here comes another unhappy moments...
y is there so many unhappy moments comin on my way ....y y y ?? just dun understand..
i come back only 6 months, but there's so many so many :S sad n unhappy incident happening one after another. i really hope i can get away or go back to aus...
but i dun understand y is there so many things happening...did i changed? or did the people n things ard me changed?
now this situation is like forcing me to leave ...
i really dunno how to help it and solve it unless one leave. i dun wan to continue staying in this position where people dun welcome me and think that i snatch their precious away. say until i so ba dao... n its after such a long time, this is still an issue. it sort of leave me no choice but to step out so tat i would at least help lessen the pressure.
but...but ... but ... y me? y y y ?? y m i the one tat need to sacrifice? y ppl seems to snatch my happiness away from me? y ? didn't i hold any value after such a long time? just bcoz i'm not attached n they r .....n so wat?? iissshhhhh.......................thinking of it just pissing me off.
really sad about it ...bcoz i duno wat to do and duno wat should be done. everything also got a limit ok...keep asking me to tolerate and be understanding (chi : ti liang & bao rong)..... then who is goin to understand my feeling n patch me up. who ??? its just so so so unfair ?? situation is just getting worse and i seriously cant guarantee wat will happen eventho he is sure about it .... i'm really starting to doubt about it but i'm still holdin on to it tightly until the last moment. other than leaving, i cant think of any other way... so i'm really planning on UK asap.
i hope things will go better ......... :(
Monday, April 28, 2008
-12:05 AM
2 weeks ago i went to rick's cafe casablanca with kal n james for a dinner....
i think this is only picture they have together...guys^^^
i like this pic....thx^^
Wednesday, April 23, 2008
-4:59 PM
today is a no mood day....
NO MOOOOOODDDD :*(((((((9sometimes i wonder in my life,i dunno whether i am living my own life or am i living for others...i always live to make people around me happy and please them as much as possible especially people i'm close with. sometimes it really tiring and stress...i have such n such plan in mind, but becoz of this n tat or to avoid people's mulut busuk or to jaga their face......i cant do it. i felt iisssshhhhh....~~~~ u know? frusss... n iritated by it. And many a times, we r tied up with commitments which have leads us to no where...again, its another tiring game. wat m i living for? erhmm, i think i shouldn't ask this question coz i know i wana live my life for Jesus, i wana do wat he wants me to do, just tat sometimes i got blur and confused and irritated by things happening ard me............... but thank God, i have Him beside me. In lowly times like this, i know He is holding me. Hope everything will goes on smoothly according to Your will, Lord... .........................................................................................................when i'm stress i feel like doin : + drinking a cup of latte under the morning sun light with the cooling morning breeze + watch a movie (only comedy and chic show with happy ending, no horror movies) + go shopping (dun mind window shop) + chilling with my frens on a couch with a bottle of red wine +++ etc..................
Monday, April 14, 2008
-11:06 PM
hey pauline...
just wondering wats goin on with u ....and wat r u thinking? wats in ur mind?
mind oh my mind .....
heart oh my heart .....
are u thinking correctly ??
are u dreaming the right dream?
then my heart say:"how am i suppose to know? u're giving me too many choices? too many things u wana do..." how ???" .............tell me how???
i find that age is catching up.. i'm 23 this year. many people would say..haih ...u're still young..
but i felt that time pass so quickly. how am i gona achieve my plans in 3 years time. the more i think of it, the more i c it not coming. the more i plan for it, the more i will get disappointed till a point i dunno wat to do. why is there so many choices in life that we need to decide. why not God just put us where He wants us to be or write us a plan book....inside will have information of who ur life partner goin to be, what r u goin to study and wat u goin to be...wat job u gona do..which company n all.... wat hardship u gona face..n etc.....but i know God doesn't want us to be robots...
i just dun like where i got to let go something to go for another but at the same i duno wats best to do ....izit good to let go or i should just stay put and let time leads me wherever. i'm scared .....i'm scared of too many wat if..... wat if i stay, wat if i go ?? no one will or even can tell me wat to do n how to decide now. END UP....i'll still be left with "u like lo....its up to u, follow ur heart..."
but if i let go, i felt really wasted...all my hard work --- " HEART work" will be just 'ppooommppp' no more, no where to be used again...i feel very 不舍得....eventho i c so many things i dun like inside, but i still like the process of it where u get to see the result of ur work built. but i know i cant stay long here.... so y waste time ? y waste effort ? y not just go n focus on wat i will settle down with rite???? yes anot? no point becoz of i felt 浪费 and 不舍得而留下. as i said, i'm not tat young anymore...so..... should make up my mind di.
God!!!!! help me God, show me Lord, tell me where to go and wat to do ......i dun wan to take the wrong step. pllleeeaaasseeee ...............
Wednesday, April 2, 2008
-3:22 PM
9 WORDS WOMEN USE _____________________________________________One day, my long lost primary class mates sent me an email about women ....i find it quite true. Are WOMEN's feeling easy to be understand? But some people say women are complicated..Are we complicated creature ?? Like the word 'fine'.... i think i used it quite often when i want to end a harsh discussion with kal...and when i say 'go ahead' with a restless tone after a situation where i can't insist on my way anymore, i meant suah la...watever la, just go ahead and do watever u like, i dun even care anymore..sometimes i think men need to use their heart to understand women more when we(women) are trying our best to please u ..DON'T take things for granted, and misuse our leniency. When we show care and love, treasure it, appreciate it and in return, show her more love and care. this is it :: 1. Fine : This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up. 2. Five Minutes : If she is getting dressed, this means a 1/2 hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house. 3. Nothing : This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine. 4. Go Ahead : This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It! 5. Loud Sigh: This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to #3 for the meaning of nothing.) 6. That's Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake. 7. Thanks: A woman is thanking you, do not question, or Faint. Just say you're welcome. 8. Whatever: Is a women's way of saying F@!K YOU! 9. Don't worry about it, I got it : Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking 'What's wrong?' For the woman's response refer to #3.
